Today I find myself wondering about what brings contentment in life. I was taught growing up to go to school, learn all I can, get a good job, work hard, get married, have a family, and that will satisfy. So I set out to do just that. In the 80's i finished school, married my high school sweetheart, launched my career, started a family, and began acquiring things like cars and houses Funny thing, they didn't satisfy. if anything, the left me feeling more empty. Reading Self Help Books didn't give me any answers, religion confused me. I remember sitting in my office one day thinking, "There will always be someone faster, smarter, better looking, getting paid more, with nicer things." I realized if that is what I pursued, I would always be left feeling like I missed out.
If anything, I am learning that life is moving to quickly to sit back and watch it go by. For me, life is about connection, about relationship, about intimacy. I truly desire to be known more than I desire to be rich. I want to have friends more than I want a position. I want to make a difference in the lives of others, more than I want status symbols. I am learning that my family brings me more happiness than a job, that time with my wife is more important than a promotion. I am starting to realize that it is possible to pursue something whole heatedly only to find out it was the wrong thing. I am coming to this conclusion as I watch others give up what is most important to pursue that which does not satisfy. As the son of a preacher, I have been told this many times. However, I am just know coming to realize it for myself. I want to make sure that I live a life of No Regrets. My goal is to make a difference, to me that will bring true happiness and contentment. My battle to get it right continues. It all comes down to the choices I make today.
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